“You expect too much from your friends and it’s unrealistic” the words flashed across my cell phone screen, my heart quickly sinking.
This single sentence would make me question my every move and every motive going forward. Will this put too much pressure on her? Or, Does this set up an unrealistic exception for her? My brain was full of questions when interacting with every one of my friends, not just the one who expressed her discontent with my expectations. When the person you have been the closest to for the longest length of time rejects you and tells you that you expect too much from people, you listen.
Was I really expecting too much from her?
I went through the full circle of emotions with this single sentence. Fear that it was true; guilt that I could have done that to anyone; shame that I could possibly make someone feel that way; doubt that it was true; denial that there was any validity to those words. It took me YEARS to process these words. After questioning my every interaction with my friends, I became a super friend. I became the doer, the checker, the planner, the helper, the fixer. I was the glue of every friendship I had, and I was determined not to put expectations on anyone. I was determined to be the very best friend that I could be. I was determined to prove this sentence wrong.
And yet, the only thing that I gained from my overachieving friendship skills was busyness and loneliness…..Continue reading by clicking the link below: